Writer’s Block

June 17, 2009 at 2:39 am (I'm not sure what this has to do with anything.)

Warning:

I’m pressing through writer’s block, and have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say.  But I’m leaving Friday, so I thought I should leave you with something. How about an interview?

Interviewer (IV, or Ivey):  Why haven’t you blogged about anything compelling or interesting for a very long time?

Burdenofglory (Bog):  I’ve been thinking a lot, but not anything I feel like writing about.  I’ve also been thinking about ME a lot, which isn’t my favorite topic to write about.

Ivey: What is happening in the gardening department?

Bog:  Since squash bugs annihilate every vining plant on the premises, I decided to plant Yukon Gold potatoes this year, and not give those nasty critters any fodder.  The potato plants are 3 feet tall, and I found some pretty tasty morsels under them the other night to eat with roasted chicken and gravy.

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Ivey:  Those look tasty, minus the dirt.

Bog:  Yes.  After washing them, they slid down like buttah.  An irrelevant sidenote is that the skins were so tender, I scrubbed them off with the dirt when I washed them.

Ivey:  Have you grown potatoes before?

Bog:  Yes.  When I was pregnant with Maddie, I planted them.  I remember digging all the potatoes up when I was horribly nauseous, crawling on my hands and knees in the dirt.  Maybe that is why it has taken almost 14 years for me to plant them again.

Ivey:  Oh, my.  Perhaps another topic?

Bog:  Certainly.

Ivey:  Ashley finally finished her quarter at SCC.  What is she doing with her time off?

Bog:  Working for Marcus.  They left at 7:00 am to install a kitchen yesterday.  She could already be thinking school wasn’t really that bad.  But probably not.

Ivey:  All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Bog:  She did have a cookie baking/nail polishing/dancing/Jane Austen movie extravaganza here the other night.  Even with her work schedule, she manages to find a bit of time to socialize.

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Ivey:  I’ve heard rumors that Ashley actually received 2 speeding tickets under 24 hours yesterday.  Is there any truth in these rumors?  Or are they malicious lies?

Bog:  Hmmm.  I’m not sure I’m at liberty to disclose that information.

Ivey:  I believe it is time to change the topic again.

Bog:  Very observant.

Ivey:  Reading any good books?

Bog:  Oh, yes.  I finished What Every Church Member Should Know About Poverty by Bill Ehlig and Ruby K. Payne, Ph.D.  I agree with the title:  we all should be reading this.  Sample kinds of questions from Chapter 11 really struck me:

  1. How many one-on-one relationships were established with individuals from poverty?
  2. How many new faces were in your congregations in the past year?
  3. How many individuals were helped with the transition from poverty to work?
  4. What is the congregation’s long-range plan for working with the poor?
  5. What specific interventions were made in educating mothers in poverty?

God keeps teaching me more and more through reading and actually doing at the same time.  Ten years ago this book would have been interesting; now it explains so much about the behaviors and worldviews of the girls I help minister to.  This book may have finally convinced me I need to go to the Christian Community Development Association’s conference this fall.  I actually told people I’d go with them; I can’t back out now.

I’m also reading a compilation of short stories by F. Scott Fitzgerald.  I never was a fan of the short story, but I am of these.  It is fun to read many of them and see patterns and similar characteristics in the main characters.

I’m taking a stack of books on vacation; we’ll see how many I actually consume.

Ivey:  Vacation?

Bog:  Yes.  We’re going to Fort Robinson, then off to the Black Hills next week.

Ivey:  Anything else you’d like to share before we close?

Bog:  Since you asked, I consider my hydrangea bushes absolutely breathtaking.  I’ve tried growing them before, but they are rather fickle, thumbing their noses at my clay soil and lack of abundant water.  However, I’ve made many promises to these bushes.  Water, mulch, and fertilizer in abundance.  Hopefully they survive.

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God’s handiwork constantly amazes me, and the field by our house is the current wonder.  I finally braved the chiggers this evening to have a closer look:

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Whoops.  How did that get in there?  There has been much ado about a popular blogger’s husband’s forearms.  Honey, we ain’t too shabby in the forearm department around here, either.  That’s all I have to say about that.

Ivey:  Thank you for your time.

Bog:  No problem.  The pleasure was all mine.

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Just plain hard

June 11, 2009 at 2:08 am (Children)

sylvan lake

I am emerging from my Feeling-sorry-for-myself, pseudo-midlife-crisis phase.  It began to set in as my oldest daughter showed bona fide signs of growing up when she started dating and talking about moving out at the end of the summer.

Huh?

Why is this a problem?  Well, I’ve been trying to figure that out.

I know I am mourning our (my) life as we know it.  My Little Women.  All my British orphans with horrid British accents.  All my pupils diligently (not) studying, either in front of the warm fire, or shivering in their rooms.

One of Ashley’s friends suggested that this was a downside of homeschooling.  Homeschool parents just can’t let go, and want to keep controlling our children.  Nice point.  We didn’t have the kindergarten moment, and all the successive moments to help us lessen our grip.  In my defense, I must add that Ashley and Katherine used to ride their bikes down the road and back, like I really was letting them go to school.  Kidding aside, Ashley has many freedoms, like no curfew, to allow her to make good (and late) decisions, while under our roof.  And for the most part, it has been good.

After our prayer meeting today, a dear kindred-spirit mommy hugged me (twice – I must look peaked).  I told her I was better, but I had talked to other moms, and my mourning was not an isolated incident, but rather common.  She told me we didn’t want our kids to make the same mistakes we did.  (Amen) And even if they do make mistakes, God can use them for His good, just like He did in our lives.  We want them to believe us when we say how hard things are when you go down “that” road.  However, from God’s perspective, all is not lost, even when they stumble.  We have the passion for certain ministries God has called us to, in part, because we made BIG mistakes, and can minister out of our brokenness.  (I know.  But my heart doesn’t want my kids to be broken, really.) You know what else she said?  She said Ashley knows what is right.  (This is true.)

Now, like never before, I have to trust God.

I have to trust God that even though this beautiful and incredibly fulfilling season of my life as a mommy who is needed 24/7 will pass, my purpose is not decimated.  God has something equally extraordinary prepared for me in the future.  It won’t look the same, but if I am serving Him wholeheartedly, it doesn’t matter.   I don’t know what that is yet, but I think about it.  Is it urban ministry?  Loving my husband, children, and grandchildren faithfully, and being a light to younger families?  When I look in our church at the Johnsons, who celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary, I know there is much more to come.  And it is good.  But it frightens me, because it won’t be the same.  I feel comfortable with “the same.”  “Unknown” is scary.  I have to trust God with these unknowns.

So, dear first-born, I cannot promise I will always be The Rock, who is always strong for you, and always has it together.   Once in a while, I may still get a bit damp in the eye, and my look will be distant, as if I was remembering something precious.  But there is a growing part of me that looks forward to being the mother of an independent young woman.  And a still smaller part of me, which wonders what God has in store for just me and Him.

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What’s going on?

June 3, 2009 at 12:31 am (Family)

What’s going on in this picture?

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A.  Maddie and Marcus are comparing leg lengths.  (Hinrichs girls, if you can help it, don’t marry a man with long legs, or your children will have no torsos.)  Have you ever noticed that Marcus’ legs come up to my shoulders?

B.  Marcus is comforting Maddie before he removes her appendix.  Need to save money for college and weddings, you know.

C.  Marcus is Maddie’s psychiatrist, and he charges her 25 cents an hour to hear all her 13-year-old angst.

D.  Marcus and Maddie are looking at the clouds, seeing what their shapes remind them of.

Hint:

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Tired

June 3, 2009 at 12:18 am (Children)

OK.  I’ve been tired.  Sleeping seems to be optional lately, from my body’s point of view.  Saturday I noticed that other people in my family are exhausted, too.

Watching the swing dance Friday night (fantastic, by the way), going to archery camp from 8 – 3 on Saturday, and cleaning up for the next graduation bash was the limit for Rebecca.

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When Maddie ran to tell me Rebecca fell asleep in the tub, my first response was horror, thinking she had drowned.  However, she had the foresight to drain the water and wrap up in a towel before conking out.  Whew.

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